History Buffs? Your Dream Job Awaits

Ever dreamed of sprinting 200 yards in extremely top heavy clothing? Of paying living tribute to the our country’s forefathers? Of feeling like a celebrity in someone else’s skin? Then you’re in luck! The Washington Nationals are looking for the best candidate at losing races. I speak, of course, about the beleaguered Teddy Roosevelt.

From the Washington Nationals:

“The Washington Nationals are seeking part-time, seasonal staff to perform as the award-winning Racing Presidents. Each runner will wear a costume depicting one of the four Mount Rushmore Presidents and race around Nationals Park while thousands cheer. Presidents will also pose for photos, sign autographs and appear at select outside events.”

So if you’re 5’7” and can carry 45 lbs, you may be in luck. Applications are due tomorrow, so act now. And get ready to lose.